Tomorrow is an early day at work. I have to appear in court for a review of a placement at 9:00am. I have very few placements so this is not a usual activity for me. I don’t like to appear in court.
Being in the field that I am a developmental disabilities social worker, I get a lot of questions about kids from others. I am still in a quandary about my own nephew. As many of you know my nephew has autism. He actually is diagnoses with Asperger’s Syndrome. Just a bit of detail for those that don’t know much about my family. My SIL is having a bit of trouble with the school and I am torn as to how to tell her to go with her problem. It is different when I advocate for the children on my caseload, most are not as capable as my nephew or do I know as well. I take care of my nephew many evenings every week, so I know him very well. He is struggling in school with fine motor activities, like writing, coloring and drawing. He isn’t able to do these activities as fast as the other children. I am torn on the reason for this, one it could be his delayed fine motor skill or two it is not the activity he *wants to be doing.
So my SIL asked me if she should let the school adapt his school work and only have him do one example or question when the other children do all of them. He understands the concepts with the one example and is actually a bit ahead academically then the other children. Nick is a regular ed classroom with no assistance.
So here is my thought on it and this is what I told her, though I am still rethinking this a lot. I told her to wait a bit and see if he starts to get more with the flow of the classroom since transitions and change can be hard for him. At conferences they can talk about options, having him go to a less stimulating area during those more fine motor skills for him. Or have him complete the work at home.
My quandary on this is from my past experience with my oldest son. Josh is very intelligent and misbehaved a bit in school when he was younger due to not being challenged, etc. So they adapted his school work, he only had to do one problem when the others had to do many repetitions to learn the material. The problem this caused in my opinion is that at some point in life you don’t know everything and you actually have to learn. Josh has hit the spot in a few classes, though most things still come very easy to him. But he does not have the skills to complete and work through longer activities. He is unable to write long stories, etc partly because he doesn’t like to and partly because he never had to. They adapted it for him since he was bright and didn’t like to write.
So back to my nephew, Nick. I am afraid with as smart as he is if they lessen his work to less than the others that is all he will achieve. Personally I don’t think making him complete those activities at home is such a bad idea since he needs the fine motor practice. He works on handwriting in occupational therapy at school and in private sessions. So this should be interesting to see how it plays out. Nick is only in 1st grade, but you don’t want to set a pattern with him that you later want to try to break. So I warned her to think this through to pass first grade and into future grades. What do you want for him?
I am definitely in my “thinking about school programs” frame of mind tonight, not like I don’t do that all day at work. Tonight we went to Open house at Josh’s school, high school that is! Wow is that weird. Anyway I am very impressed with the communication I have gotten from his communications and algebra teacher. They both had email mailing list that they send to each Monday. It is wonderful!!! I have all the assignments and stuff for the entire semester. I hope his teachers next semester will do the same. Email is the way to go!
I spoke to the communications teacher, since as I discussed above, Josh hates to write. It is not that he is unable, he just is a lot like me and is a perfectionist. If he doesn’t think he can write the most profound thing in the world, he won’t do it. He would rather get a “0” then be embarrassed by work he believe is below his standards. I tell him just write what ever already!! So he struggles as do I with the same thing. Except on xanga, this is like venting for me…someone to whine about my day too. By typing out my thoughts I am able to digest what I think more, etc.
She did say he scored very well on his reading scores, this I already knew. He reads at college level and has for a few years. I just need him to get that knowledge out on paper. So I think we will be struggling with that a bit this year. He has a huge grad standards project due on a plot and character analysis. I think he has chosen a book, but isn’t done reading it yet. SO I think I will have to sit down with him and figure out a timeline for completing this.
Ok..sick of hearing about education junk..that is what my day has been like! Anyway Josh babysat Tommy for me when hubby and I went to Open house. Tommy was sleeping when we left and I told Josh he is going to have to change his diaper when he gets up. He is ok, but he better only be wet. So Josh changed him and took him in the living room to play with him. About 2 minutes later Tommy fills his drawers. It smells and Josh has to changed it. I get home he says “You owe me soooo big. I had to change 2 diapers!!!’ Josh has only changed a total of 3 diapers since Tommy has been born. He avoids it. I was proud of him for changing him right away and not leaving him for until we got hone. He is a good boy!
I have to write him a note to get out of school tomorrow. Hubby has to take hi mto the dentist since I think either he is getting his wisdom teeth in or they are infected. He is all swollen and it hurts to eat. ARGH!! So he will have that looked at tomorrow.
Well Tommy just went to bed, so I better too so I can get up early. If you made it this far…good for you……….and thanks! Sometimes I just have to ramble a bit to clear my head before bed.
Night!
This kinda of thinking just overwhelms me. I have no idea what should be done to effectively educate children. I’ve been considering homeschooling the boys for that very reason. Then I can try however many techniques it takes to get them to excel.
I do hope you come up with a solution that is best for all involved! As caring of a mother as you are I have no doubt that you will! (((HUGS)))